Hope

And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves, growing on the trees, just as things grow in time-lapse movies, I have the familiar conviction that life is beginning over again with the spring. 

This time around, we are not going to let it pass us idly by. This one crazy, painful, purgatory of a year has instilled a sense of urgency and fragility in its survivors. They recognize the ancient truth more clearly, through the fog than a lot of people have for a very long time - life is very short, that it will end is the only guarantee. Hope might be the correct response to the human condition, but this past year has in equal measure disabused us of our unbridled optimism as it has inspired confidence in humankind. 

A universal enemy was not enough for us to unite as a species, we were still beset by obstacles and opportunities. We had no shortage of demagogues who would strip communities of a fighting chance at survival, if it meant some transient gain was in the offing for them.

No, progress is not guaranteed, positive change is not a given, our survival as a species is not a certainty. Equity, equality, and justice are not the natural byproduct of progress, the arc of the universe does not do auto-pilot very well, it needs to be bent in the correct direction because self-interest, tribalism, and survival-instinct-hacking are mighty foes that have the advantage of being the path of least-resistance, even if it is out of guile for the few and out of desperation for the many. 

But hope indeed is a thing with feathers That perches in the soul -
And sings the tune without the words -
And never stops - at all -
I’ve heard it in the chillest land -
And on the strangest Sea* -

and I've heard it in the midst of a devastating global pandemic. Even when we felt alone, we weren’t really, because we were a part of a vast and deeply interconnected us. It is true that the world has been getting better at an astonishing pace by every conceivable global metric^#. It is also true that stories of kindness, and generosity, of going above and beyond were not hard to find in 2020. Good news - whether it is the slow creep of reduction in instances of preventable communicable diseases like polio or the fact that most charities received a record amount of small donations in the midst of a global recession do not make their way to either the parchment or the pixels of our non-stop news because it is not urgent, and not clickbaity enough. Nevertheless, it is true. Every time we think as a species we have measured our capacity to meet a challenge, we just need to look around -albeit at the not easy-to-find but omnipresent instances-, and we are reminded that capacity may well be limitless. T.S. Elliot famously wrote that light is the visible sign of the invisible light, human desire to do good, to be good is that invisible light for me. We just need to keep working toward a more perfect world, not just for our tribe (however we may define that), but for all tribes. 

I have learned that certainty is a lie, the world is dynamic, fleeting, and ever-changing, we just need to open our eyes to its maddening pace, treasure every moment, leave every moment behind, and go work to fight for and build a world that we can be proud of. After all, we are capable of greatness, we are made of star-stuff.

* From “Hope” is the thing with feathers - (314) by Emily Dickinson

# For more about how the world is getting better - Factfulness: Ten Reasons We're Wrong About the World--and Why Things Are Better Than You Think Book by Anna Rosling Rönnlund, Hans Rosling, and Ola Rosling

Art

I had the chance of speaking with a musician at Berklee who is a mini-celebrity in his own right, as part of our conversation we explored the nature of Art which I felt was worth sharing:

I really liked the themes of art & creativity that emerged from our conversation. The sentiment that art can at the same time be both how you express yourself as well as something which cannot really be defined or just something that elicits a response from an audience. When looking at masterpieces we tend to view them as static - something that has a sense of achievement and finality, but when seen through the eyes of the artist, their art is really a dynamic living entity. The art influences the artist as much the artist influences the art and it can be this positive feedback loop that leads the artist to learn and grow with their art and as a result, their art itself evolves over time too. This kinda reminds me of Pablo Picasso’s work, he is famously said to have moved on from one style of painting to the next as he grew as a person and as an artist. I like to think that this was the reason he moved from one style to the next, on the other hand, it could be he just got bored, enjoyed the thrill of learning new things and conquering new domains, or simply wanted to be relevant in the ever-changing discourse.

Entry for the Graduate Commencement : Student Speaker 2019

Respected chancellor, faculty, dignitaries on and off the stage, parents, allies and the graduating class of 2019 it is an honor to be addressing you on this auspicious day. This is my second college graduation but my first graduation ceremony. I have always romanticized commencement ceremonies because they represent a new beginning and celebrate significant achievements. Take a moment to look around and soak it in, we did it, we made it.

While we bask in the hard work and perseverance of years past, this is a perfect time to look at the world around us, the world may not be perfect by any measure but this is the world that we are inheriting. We are beset by obstacles and opportunities. Mahatma Gandhi once said that you must be the change that you want to see in the world. Today, I beseech you to not just be that change but also inspire that change. We, the graduating class of 2019 have been blessed to have received one of the finest education that this country and the world has to offer and just like the Minutemen of yore that changed the world by giving birth to an idea that has lit the world for centuries, the Minutemen and women of this millennia have everything we need to change it again. We are prepared to tackle the generational challenge of climate change, to combat the wave of bigotry and hatred that is sweeping the globe, we are prepared to embrace the power of diversity of thought, we are prepared to do all of this and much much more. Our darkest days are always followed by our finest hours.

I have some wishes that I hope the universe and our own fortitude would grant us -
I hope we give credit to the works and not the words
I hope we do not fear death, but a wasted life
I hope we persevere to become better human beings
I hope that we never doubt that a small group of committed and thoughtful citizens can change the world
I hope we never forget that a ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for
I hope we remember that hatred begets hatred
And most importantly, I sincerely hope we never stop learning and growing

I know this is a historic speech and I am grateful for the opportunity, feeling the weight of judgment by future classes, as a computer scientist, I decided to seek some help from the future and asked an AI if it had any life advice for the graduating class of 2019 by training a language model on some of the most iconic graduation speeches. Here Is what your future overlords want you to know today - “Knowledge is our past and future, Let's go do what using technology allows us to do and make sure you are educating future generations. Give kids access to college and university competency and skills. Create an array of basic volunteer jobs -for most young adults who need them immediately. Innovate on the clean air of our cities—bring them power and innovation. Help buy more electric cars. And finally, assume responsibility for getting businesses excited and Drive an incoming recession!”

On a more serious note, in this fast-paced world gratitude and service are two things that can help keep us grounded. Volunteering for a cause that you believe in has the power to move and inspire you that material things cannot come close to matching. As you move from success to success in your life, I hope you never forget the contributions that countless people have made along the way. I know that as we celebrate our success today, for many if not most of us, it would have been impossible to achieve without the strong support of our family and loved ones. Even within our UMass family, there are countless people who work tirelessly to ensure that we succeed, a huge shoutout to - the international programs office, the CCPH, the stonewall center, the library staff, UMass dining, office for professional development, career services, and of course the graduate school.

As we talk about and celebrate success today, we should take a moment to talk about failure as well. Failure often gets shrugged under a rug, we are taught - there is no room for failure, we must succeed as at all costs, failure is the reward for people who do not work hard enough. Nothing can be farther from the truth. Flow and ebb is the nature of life, success and failure are the yin and yang of professional as well as personal life. No matter how much you prepare, how hard you work, how much luck you have on your side - brushes with failure are inevitable in life. It is how we react when those unwanted moments do arrive that measures us as a person. Denial and giving up altogether are natural responses, they are the easy way out. No one wants to talk about their failure. But wholehearted acceptance of the fact and analysis of what went wrong can make us a stronger person than we ever were. The importance of analyzing what went wrong, and realizing that we must do better, and we will do better cannot be overstated.

Learn, learn from your mistakes, learn from other’s mistakes, learn from every opportunity that life presents you with. As you walk out of the gates of this great fountain of education it is easy to believe that you know everything you need to know, after burning the midnight oil for that last page of your thesis, you have more than earned the hubris. Do not fall into that trap. The only common thread that binds successful people across every domain is the fact that they never gave up an opportunity to learn and improve themselves. Do not let the current political climate fool you, no man's ignorance will ever be his virtue. Always ask yourself is this the best that you can be? Lifelong learning should be a goal that all of us aspire towards.

The key to long-lasting tranquility, I have found, is understanding that nothing is black-and-white every person that you come across is a complex being, struggling and fighting fires across dimensions of their life that you do not even know to exist. So be patient and embrace the grey. Let people know that you understand ‘life’ happens and that you trust people to do their best, and they will. Class of 2019 you are going to change the world. As you go about it, I hope you embrace diversity and inclusiveness, because together we are much stronger. I wish you all the very best because the future can be whatever you want it to be. With a UMass education, you have the perfect chisel, all you need to do now is carve!

 Go UMass! 

Wings In The Sky

Fulfilling man’s ultimate fantasy 
Metal angel 
Gliding over a sheet of white, punctured only by mountains 
Can you make snow angels though?
Reducing cars to toys
Mighty waves in the ocean of life to ripples in a pond
Safe away from the mundanity of life, inspiring awe
Revealing the serpentine nature of the determined water cutting through rock
Shining Some light on who gives the terrestrial bound shade when there is too much light 
Mountains to sand dunes on a canvas 
Escaping trivialities like weather
LEGO houses 
Proof of circles in crops and extra life 
Managing to make even the big apple (look) small 
Live demonstration of geography lessons
Building flashing lights to welcome you back to the planet 
Along with chemtrail conspiracies 
Giving hope to the man stuck in life’s jam
That he too may soar towards the infinite 

When the bombers come there is no place to hide 
Caves and cities turned to dust in an instant 
Why did you who embodies the highest ideals bend to our basest urges
When we decided to keep weapons away from space, why couldn’t we protect our airspace?
When you are turned into a WMD against your will
And made to crash into places and kill
We must hold up a mirror and ask where did we go wrong 
It isn’t surprising then that you would want to vanish without a trace
Is it too late for disarmament to be our saving grace?
Can the skies be friendly again?
Let us work hard so that when the little girl looks at an airplane passing by she is filled with amazement and hope,  and not dread for her life.

 

 

 

 

Written somewhere in the United States airspace between BOS and SFO, my two homes this summer.

Trains

This is farthest from a poem as anything can ever be, but I like it so hic sumus (here we are).

1.           Jungle gyms in the dusty photo albums with light spots fighting to join              the memories,      
2.           The summer routine.
3.           Looking at the face of your 5-year-old companion as you leave everyone            behind, 
4.           only to discover the connected nature of love ever present.
5.           Fighting the hot capital to reach panchvati through sweat or blood.
6.           R-AC
7.           Being waitlisted to fly for the first time.
8.           The wait at the station where the tracks end to be reunited.
   
   
9.           Traveling to the unknown, to a new beginning, to knowledge, to be                      'inspired by life',
10.           scared but excited, new dreams in eyes.
11.           Those painful journeys back after precious hours spent with your core                group,
12.           Regular helpless humiliation in front of strangers as a brother extracts              his right.
13.           Clawing at the meaning of life on the door gushing past an ancient                      civilization,
14.           Socializing on the train and meeting unexpected friends,
15.           College escape to paradise.
    
    
16.           Trains have been there as life changed over the decades into something               that is hard to recognize,
17.           Being inspired to write for posterity on a ride through a thousand                        waterfalls,  
18.           Riding by the Greek countryside to find monasteries in the sky.
19.           Letters to institutions thousands of miles away, knocking on the doors              of a new world.
20.           Unplanned craziness with a partner in crime, 
21.           Finishing a thesis to become a bachelor.
22.           Reading through Kennedy's home, aspiring;
23.           Trains follow and sift through the maze of tracks
24.           The rail tracks run through my blood.

=========================================================
Notes:

 1. Sometime in 1999 or 2000 the family visited my aunt stationed in Jammu. Pictures claim that we decided the supports to secure the middle berths in the coupe are going to be our jungle gyms. memories captured on film have started becoming one with the light spots as exposure to light damages these old photographs.

2. Almost every childhood summer after 2001 was spent with the grandparents in Dehradun which involved, them coming down to Mumbai before the schools closed, and then the four of us undertaking a 1700 km journey.

3. The first time we traveled with them, the train was at the station with only a 2-minute scheduled stop. My brother and I were the first ones to be loaded on the train, followed by some bags as the train left the station. We stood there looking at each other as the platform slipped away with our frantic parents trying to sign some message through the window pane. After what seemed like an eternity but in all likelihood was only a few minutes the connected coaches delivered our grandfather to our audible relief.

5. These trips would require a transit through the hot mess that was New Delhi. One summer when it was only the siblings with their grandmom the younger one started bleeding through the nose to make things a little more interesting.

6. Reservation against cancellation. When you get the distintive honor to sit on a berth but not sleep

7. Parents and the children were scheduled to visit Dehradun but our waitlisted tickets had other plans. Hope is a powerful thing, we were at the platform counting on a last minute miracle. We saw the Golden temple (train) come and leave the station without us. The children were woken up in the middle of that night to be told we were flying there instead. That is how we ended up on a Japan-bound Airindia flight that had a stopover in Delhi. The sibling's first flight. 

8. We would eagerly wait at the Dehradun railway station for the always-late train to pull in and bring with it our parents at the end of the summer, here to take us back home after two carefree months. P.S. railway tracks end at the Dehradun station.

10. College was a 15-hour train ride away from home. Manipal's words are 'inspired by life'.

12. It was always fun to come home on the occasional long weekend, but going back was equally hard

13. For some reason, the sibling enjoyed shouting random made up advice when he came to see me off at the station. Much to the amusement of a train filled with students headed to Manipal, I was advised to try to pass as 5 years of failing exams was enough. It did not matter that I was one of the top students I had to sit with them for the next 15 hours, that was the ballgame. 

14. I have had many good existential conversations with the parents as we stood at the doors of the train as it rushed through the countryside.

16. I discovered Gokarna on a trip with some of the best college friends 

19. Reference to the scenic Konkan route between Manipal and Mumbai where I wrote my first published blog, as well as the nature of life 

20. The train journey from Athens to Meteora in Greece with new friends was fun,  exploring centuries-old monasteries in the skies that preserved the Hellenic culture was a highlight of that summer.

21. Tweaking statements-of-purpose on a train journey as I knocked on the doors of eminent universities to master computer science.

22. I had to go to Manipal to defend my bachelor's thesis based on the work that I did at IISc to earn my (bachelor of technology) degree. Just hours before the train journey was about to commence the awesome mother and I decide that she should come along and make this a trip to remember adding to our last-minute-we-live-only-once-lets-do-this shenanigans. 

24. Commuting through the heart of Boston while working at Samsung Research America gives you enough time to dig into a book, to grow, to let the Kennedy-touch rub on 

26. Ode to my paternal grandfather who worked with the Indian Railways.

The voices in your head

It is just you and me now
Don't you enjoy this eerie silence, this eternal stillness
I have been with you all along
through the secrets, though the heartache
I was there when the end was so near that you could taste it,
I was here when it all slipped away
I have seen your struggle, I have seen your desperation,
I have seen your deceit
There are no curtains here only shadows

But you did not come this far to only come this far
Nobody's life is perfect,
You just need a magnification glass to see the flows and the ebbs,
you may project strength to the world, but you cannot hide from me
You know you have gotten so far only because of providence
But was it really a cosmic power pulling the strings?
Was it good karma? Was it pious souls praying for your success?
Or was it all of the above and none of it?

We have a long way to go
As the cars jam the freeway and people jam the trains
as a new dawn ominously approaches,
the day beckons - come make of me what you will!
It is just you and me now
That's how it has always been.

We know the way!

A smart guy once said that Presidential elections are won and lost on one square foot of real estate, up here - Leo McGarry on the West Wing 

 You must have heard that our actions are manifestations of our thoughts. I sometimes think that we have all been cursed like Cassandra, our rational selves know what course of action is the best for us, how hard work and perseverance can lead to success; however we rarely end up listening to that voice in our heads.

One of those beliefs is the power of believing that you will achieve your goals. This little gem has been codified in multiple ways, whether you call it 'the power of positive thinking' or 'the secret', all of these boil down to a simple fundamental truth. You can achieve your dreams only when you are truly convinced that, in spite of how bad it may look right now, you will eventually reach your goals.

This stratagem is what Steve Jobs stretched to the limits, much to the bewilderment of his co-workers who ended up labelling it to be 'reality distortion'. The reality distortion field was how Steve perceived the real world, I am sure he was not even aware that he was bending the truth and conflating facts with fiction just to ensure that reality conferred with the picture of the future that he had painted in his head, and if it did not it was time to change that particular reality. That is how you create the future.

The reality distortion field was a confounding melange of a charismatic rhetorical style, an indomitable will, and an eagerness to bend any fact to fit the purpose at hand. If one line of argument failed to persuade, he would deftly switch to another. Sometimes, he would throw you off balance by suddenly adopting your position as his own, without acknowledging that he ever thought differently. - Andy Hertzfeld

More than anyone else you need to believe in yourself, you need to trust that you have it in you to realise those dreams. No one is genetically programmed for success, if you work hard enough you can master any skill (yes even math), the world is your oyster. This is a hard fact to digest for some of us, because it entails that the only thing standing between us and our goals, is us. 

But once you internalize it this can be a very powerful tool in your toolbox. If we believe that we can achieve something we start acting like the person who can and, subconsciously, slowly we become the person who can. 

Only when you are dead sure you will reach the goal do you have the audacity to take the risks that you need to take. Only then will you make the investments that you need to make. Only then will you dedicate the insane amount of time that it takes (no one has the time to put in all it takes at the same time create a safetynet). Only then will you commit to it.  All it takes is a leap of faith, in yourself.

Happy Birthday Dr brother, may all your dreams come true!